سائنسی تھیوری کیا ہے؟

تحریر: ڈاکٹر عاکف خان

 ایک ہوتی ہے انگریزی والی تھیوری جس کو آپ سوچ یا نظریہ کہتے ہیں۔ ایک ہوتی ہے سائنٹیفک تھیوری۔ یہ الگ چیزیں ہیں۔ سائنٹیفک تھیوری فزیکل لاز کی وضاحت کو کہتے ہیں جو تجربات اور مشاہدات کے بعد وضع کی جاتی ہے۔ لاز اور پرنسپلز وہ مشاہدات ہیں جو ہم کائنات میں دیکھتے ہیں۔ جیسے ارتقاء، گریویٹی، وقت کی سمت ، تھرموڈائینیمکس، انرجی کی کنزرویشن، قانون بقائے مومینٹم، انرجی ماس کنورژن۔ اکثر لوگ تھیوری کی ان دو تعریفوں کو مدغم کرتے ہیں یا ان کو سائینٹفک تھیوری کا علم نہیں ہوتا۔   

 اب ان لاز میں سے کچھ ہر کوئی دیکھ اور سمجھ سکتا ہے۔ جیسے آپ کبھی بھی دسویں مالے سے چھلانگ نہیں لگائیں گے کیونکہ آپ کو علم ہے کہ نیچے گر کر کام ہو جانا ہے۔ آپ کو تھیوری آف گریویٹی کا کوئی علم نہ بھی ہو تب بھی آپ ایسا نہیں کریں گے۔ کیونکہ گریویٹی کا لاء سب کی سمجھ میں آتا ہے۔ مگر کچھ لاز تھوڑے کمپلیکیٹڈ ہوتے ہیں جیسے تھرموڈائینیکمس کا لاء یا انرجی کنزرویشن یا ارتقاء۔ ان کا مشاہدہ ہر کوئی نہیں کر سکتا یا جانچ نہیں سکتا۔ یا تو وہ سست ہوتے ہیں یا مبہم۔

 جیسے ارتقاء ایک لاکھوں کروڑوں اربوں صدیوں پر محیط مشاہدہ ہے جسے آپ اپنی زندگی میں نہیں کر سکتے۔ ہاں آپ چھوٹے جانداروں یا پھر ایک لمبے عرصے کے دوران کیے گئے مشاہدات جیسے فوسلز وغیرہ یا ڈی این اے کو دیکھ کر کر سکتے ہیں۔ اب اس کے لیے ہر بندے کے پاس وقت تو نہیں ہوتا لہذا سائنسدان ہی یہ کام کرتے ہیں۔ عام شخص کو سمجھ نہیں آتی وہ اسے جھوٹ یا سازش قرار دیتا ہے۔ اسی طرح تھرموڈائنیمکس یا انرجی کنزرویشن کے لاء اگرچہ مشاہداتی بھی ہیں۔ سب کو علم ہے کہ ٹھنڈی چیز سے گرم چیز کو مزید گرم نہیں کیا جا سکتا۔ مگر مبہم ہے۔ اسی لیے لوگ پانی سے چلانے والی گاڑیاں بنانے کے دعوے کرتے ہیں۔ 

اب تھیوری یہ کرتی ہے کہ ان مشاہدات یعنی لاز کی وضاحت کرتی ہے کہ یہ کیسے اور کیوں ہو رہا ہے۔ یہ کام تجربات اور سائنٹیفیک میٹھڈ سے کیا جاتا ہے۔ تھیوری کو وقت کے ساتھ ساتھ بہتر بھی بنایا جا سکتا ہے اور نئی تھیوری بھی لائی جا سکتی ہے جو اسی عمل کو کسی اور طرح واضح کرے۔ 

وضاحت کا یہ فائدہ ہوتا ہے کہ آپ اس علم سے فائدہ اٹھا کر ٹیکنالوجی یا انسانی استعمال میں لا سکیں اس قدرتی عمل، لاء یا پرنسپل کو۔ جیسے آگ ایک قدرتی عمل ہے۔ پرنسپل ہے فیول، آکسیڈنٹ اور حرارت آگ بنائیں گے۔ مگر کیا ہے کیسے لگتی ہے یہ سمجھ آ گیا تو آپ ایک حرارت کی تھیوری بنا لیں گے جس سے آپ کو علم ہو گا کہ آگ کیسے لگتی ہے خود کیسے لگائے جا سکتی ہے اس کو کنٹرول کیسے کیا جا سکتا ہے۔ اس علم اور سائنسی تھیوری کی بنیاد پر آپ چولہا بنا سکتے ہیں ہیٹر بنا سکتے ہیں گھر اور اپنے بچوں کو گرم رکھ سکتے ہیں۔ کوئی اور شخص آ کر آگ لگنے کے عمل پر مزید تفصیلی وضاحت دے کر اس سے اور فائدہ اٹھا سکتا ہے۔ مثال کے طور پر اس نے نئی حرارت کی وضاحت دی جو آپ کی وضاحت سے بہتر ہے۔ اب اس وضاحت یا تھیوری کے نتیجے میں آپ آگ کو مزید اچھے طریقے سے استعمال کر سکتے ہیں اور لوہے کو پگھلا سکتے ہیں جس سے آپ جہاز بنا کر اپنے بچوں کو سردی سے دور گرم علاقے میں لے جا سکتے ہیں۔

  اسی طرح نیوٹن نے گریویٹی کی ایک بنیادی تھیوری پیش کی۔ وہ اب بھی کام کرتی ہے۔ جب آئن سٹائن آیا اس نے بہتر تھیوری دی جو زیادہ بہتر کام کرتی ہے اور ان جگہوں تک کام کرتی ہے جہاں نیوٹن کی تھیوری کام نہیں کر سکتی۔ 

اسی طرح ارتقاء کا قانون ہے۔ جب سائنسدانوں کو ارتقاء کے قانون کی سمجھ آ گئی نیچرل سلیکشن وغیرہ تو میڈیکل سائنس نے ترقی کر لی۔ بیکٹیریا، پھپھوندی، وائرسز وغیرہ سے ہونے والی بیماریوں، جینیاتی بیماریوں پر قابو پا لیا گیا۔ اینٹی بائیوٹکس ایجاد ہوئیں۔ جانداروں کے درمیاں مشابہت کے باعث جانداروں پر تجربات کرنا ممکن ہوا۔ ویکسینز ایجاد ہوئیں۔ گھوڑے کے خون سے انسولین تیار کی جاتی ہے جو ذیابیطس کی بیماری کے علاج میں استعمال ہوتی ہے (اگرچہ اب دوسرے طریقوں سے بھی بنتی ہے)۔ اسی طرح ویکسینز بھی اسی علم کی بدولت ممکن ہوئیں، اناٹومی، فزیالوجی اور میڈیکل سائنس اتنا ترقی کر گئی کہ آج آپ ٹیسٹ ٹیوب بے بیز اور جانوروں کے اعضاء کی انسانوں میں پیوند کاری تک کر سکتے ہیں۔ 

یہ سب سائینٹیفک میٹھڈ اور سائنسی تھیوریز ہی کی بنیاد پر ہوا جو ان حقائق کی وضاحتیں ہیں اور یہ وضاحتیں مشاہدات، انفارمڈ مفروضوں اور پھر ان کی انتہائی باریک بینی سے کی گئے بار بار پڑتال اور تجربات کے نتائج سے آتی ہیں جنہیں پھر دوسرے سائنسدان دوبارہ آزادانہ طور پر جانچتے ہیں اور تب جا کر ان کو قابل عمل یا درست سمجھا جاتا ہے۔ اسی کے ساتھ لاء تو وہی رہتے ہیں مگر تھیوریز میں مزید بہتری کی گنجائش ہوتی ہے۔ اگر آپ کسی قدرتی عمل کی بہتر سائنٹیفک تھیوری مشاہدات، انفارمڈ مفروضے، تجربات اور پھر اس کی آزادانہ جانچ سے لا سکتے ہیں تو سو بسم اللہ۔ آپ کو کوئی بھی نہیں روکے گا۔ بلکہ آپ کو شاید نوبیل کے لیے نامزد کر دیا جائے۔ مگر یاد رہے آپ کو پورے سائنٹیفک میٹھڈ کے پراسس سے اپنی تھیوری کو گزارنا ہو گا۔ 

تنبیہہ: اس ویب سائٹ پر موجود تمام کانٹینٹ اوریجنل اور ڈاکٹر عاکف خان کی ملکیت ہے۔ بغیر اجازت اس کانٹینٹ کو چھاپنے،  چوری اور سرقہ بازی کی صورت میں کاپی رائٹ لاز مجوزہ 1966/2000 حکومت پاکستان یا دائرہ کار کے قوانین کے مطابق کاروائی کی جا سکتی ہے۔ 

Is the Fear of AI Legit?

 By Dr. Akif Khan

ChatGPT is just another Bitcoin with a hell lot of hype and even more instability - only causing two things: either making people extremely excited or giving them screaming abdabs.

Please, don’t get triggered on this blasphemy - let me explain. Yes, many people thought Bitcoin was a farce and apparently lost the opportunity to earn millions of dollars through investing in it on the onset. But remember, there are many who also couldn’t make any fortune but instead lost their lifesavings to Bitcoin. Let me tell you something and you can confirm this with any computer scientist privately (because they’re not gonna accept this publicly) that this has been an ongoing phenomenon in CS research community to make predictive and human-like algorithms from big data (such as Tweets and FB posts), which has been happening for more than a decade now. Big data and data science are not new research fields in computer sciences. For example, millions of posts and Tweets around a certain topic could be accessed by anyone via a simple code to be analysed and studied later. Although, Twitter and Facebook made it difficult now. There are restrictions and paywalls now as far as I know.

To be honest, I don’t know what’s so special about ChatGPT because these things have been around us for a long time now. We have Google search, Google Assistant, SEO, Siri, Alexa, XiaoAi TongXue and loads of other apps and softwares to write down longer sentences and even intelligent graphic tools within softwares like Photoshop, filters and whatnot. True, ChatGPT is unique in its pre-trained transformative text that it learns first and then generates a response. Many would argue that it is not based on search engine but learned data. That is also true. But isn’t everything pre-trained in one sense or another? There is another novelty of remembering the previous questions during a unique chat session unlike Siri or Google Assistant, where you ask them who is Newton and if you ask next where was he born, they would not know who is the “he” in the question. Sometimes, they do. But is that it? Now all these tools and algorithms are gathered at one place only to be given fancy names and “AI” tag (essentially a rebranding of existing packages), just like Tesla and SpaceX, to produce longer texts and pretty images, only to discover a lot of problems, instability and implementation issues later. 

Moreover, you can’t just ask these AI softwares anything only to get a perfect result. An ordinary user will definitely wonder that they’re not using the tool properly when they don’t get desired results. The beautiful images and interesting essays you see going viral are a result of cleverly crafted keywords. It’s just like using Google. You will always find a colleague in the office who can help you find your desired results from Google search. Even when everyone has Google search at their fingertips but not “the skill” to use it. 

You must also be wondering why and how a natural/physical scientist/engineer is able to comment on ChatGPT.  Humbly, yours truly has been into computers and coding for around 25 years now, having started using computers from 286/386, Windows 3.1, DOS, GWBasic, Fortran, Dbase and C and then seeing the whole evolution of coding, big data, computers and internet from Netscape, Yahoo/MSN messengers, Orkut and mIRC, birth of FB/Twitter to Snapchat and “TitTok.” We still use and analyse big data and codes as complex as FT, FEFFIT, WT, DFT, ab-initio, VASP etc. for our research projects related to chemistry, physics and materials engineering. 

Having said that, the point that I am trying to emphasise is that the fear of AI is completely unfounded. What we see around us is mostly off-the-shelf and custom AIs, which have already been around for a while. I don’t remember where but I heard Yuval Noah Harari making an interesting point that if these AI softwares enhance our intelligence, they also multiply our stupidity by equal proportions. Although, he himself has presented AI as something too futuristic and perfect at other places.

Some would argue that AIs have started passing difficult tests and beating grandmasters in chess. But look at it this way. Any smart person with an access to internet can pass any test today. Ever tried copying and pasting a riddle in Google search bar to find the answer? True, ChatGPT is pre-trained and is not working with research engines at the backend but the data it has been fed is the same that search engines use. 

Secondly, beating grandmasters in chess, a game based on chances and calculations, with skyrocketing internet and processing speeds, is great but not too impressive. IBM’s Deep Blue defeated a grandmaster in 1996 with a processing power of hardly around 3.8 GHz (and around 11 GFlops), less than a core 2 duo i3 system. With currently available computers, you are talking at least thousands of times more processing power. Throw in a GPU and imagine. The smartphones you’re holding in your hands are more powerful than Deep Blue, which could evaluate 200 million positions per second. Today’s iPhone 13 has a processing power of ~16 Teraflops (1 TFLOP = 1000 GFLOPs). Imagine how much processing powers desktop, gaming PCs, mining systems, mainframes and supercomputers hold right now. Yet, ask ChatGPT a dozen questions and you will only get 3 or 4 answers to your satisfaction.

Human minds and feelings are not very much predictable. They are more complex and dependent on too many different kinds of variables, many unknown. Human emotions and feelings are not analytical and rational. They don’t have patterns. Yes, you can manipulate them with the help of advertisements and traditional & social media and can predict and redirect shopping behaviours, dating preferences, porn choices and fashion trends but that’s about it. The cultural intricacies, religious beliefs, relationship dynamics, love and affection to their near ones and other aspects of social sphere such as poverty, politics, voting behaviours, tolerance, gender dynamics, cultural context etc. are kind of no-go areas for such analytically predictive and calculating algorithms atop the fact that most of our computer scientist and AI-enthusiasts and geeks don’t even understand or love to talk about these issues, let alone consider them. 

For example, can AIs accurately predict the stock market? To an extent, maybe, but not perfectly or accurately despite such a huge computer processing power at our disposal. Why? In any Sci-Fi movie with a time machine in it, what does the antagonists do on the onset? They go back in time and invest money in the companies like IBM, Facebook or Tesla, they know would be paying them back in millions, right? So why not (or can’t) we do the same? It is only because that AI/computers can only predict human element to an extent due to the unpredictable and complex nature of it. They could, maybe, in the future, know all the variables, dynamics and complexities of human behaviour and somehow all the data and computer scientists, neuroscientists, materials engineers and geneticists could work hands in hands to build fortune-teller AIs in the future but not now. And who is to say that those AIs sans human element won’t fail like the first matrix? Who is to say those AIs won’t turn into dreaming Sonny, evil VIKI (iRobot) or strategist Dolores (Westworld) with even more complex emotions? 

This is also human nature that we start thinking about worst-case scenarios and start panicking about new things instead of sitting back, asking questions from experts and realising the historicity of events. We tend to love sensationalism. Maybe there should be an AI studying this behaviour as well. 

A concern has heen raised by academics is that students might use ChatGPT to write essays and assignments. Apparently, ChatGPT passed difficult university exams. First off, there are now multiple tools that can detect the ChatGPT written content based on the same algorithms. Secondly, the university tests are mostly analytical and their answers are objective. The objectivity vs subjectivity is the key here. 

Don’t worry. If AI turned out to be Skynet at the end, some some white protagonist, the saviour of humanity, will come and crush it by finding some flaw in it.

And no, this blurb is not written by ChatGPT. 

فیسبکی دانشور کیسے بنا جائے - حصہ سوئم

 

فیسبکی دانشور کے خدشات - ایک نظم

(پارٹ تھری: منظوم، امجد اسلام امجد سے معذرت کے ساتھ)

دانشور کی طبیعت میں

یہ کیسا بچپنا فیسبک نے رکھا ہے

کہ یہ جتنا بڑا، جتنا بھی مضبوط ہو جائے

اسے تائیدِ تازہ کی ضرورت پھر بھی رہتی ہے

یقیں کی آخری حد تک دلوں میں لہلہائے

نگاہوں سے ٹپکتا ہو، لہو میں جگمگائے

ہزاروں طرح سے دلکش، حسیں حالے بنائے

اسے اظہار کے ریئکٹس کی حاجت پھر بھی رہتی ہے !

دانشور مانگتا ہے یوں گواہی اپنے ہونے کی

کہ جیسے طفلِ سادہ شام کو اک پوسٹ کرے

اور شب میں بارہا اٹھے

فیسبک کو کھول کر دیکھے

کہ لائیکس اب کہاں تک پہنچے !

دانشور کی طبیعیت میں عجب تکرار کی خو ہے

کہ یہ اقرار کے لفظوں کو سننے سے نہیں تھکتا

پوسٹ کرنے کی گھڑی ہو یا کوئی انٹرویو کی ساعت ہو

اسے بس ایک ہی دھن ہے

"کہو میں دانشور ہوں !"

"کہو مجھ سے میں دانشور ہوں !"

"تمہیں مجھ میں دانشور دکھتا ہے !"

کچھ ایسی بے سکونی ہے دانشوری کی سر زمینوں میں

کہ جو اہلِ دانش کو سدا بے چین رکھتی ہے

کہ جیسے پھول میں خوشبو، کہ جیسے ہاتھ میں پارہ،

کہ جیسے شام کا تارہ !

دانش کرنے والوں کی سحر راتوں میں رہتی ہے

گماں کی شاخ پر پوسٹ بنتا ہے دانش والی

یہ عین وصل میں بھی ارریلیونٹ ہونے کے خدشوں میں رہتے ہیں

دانش کے مسافر زندگی جب کاٹ چکتے ہیں

تھکن کی لائیکیں چنتے، دانشوری کے ریئکٹ سمیٹتے

سمے کی راہگزر کی آخری سرحد پہ رکتے ہیں

تو کوئی ڈوبتی سانسوں کی ڈوری تھام کر

دھیرے سے کہتا ہے

" یہ سچ ہے ناں !

ہماری زندگی فالوورز کے نام لکھی تھی

یہ دھندلکا سا جو نگاہوں سے قریب و دور پھیلا ہے

اسی کا نام دانشوری ہے !

تمہیں مجھ میں دانشور دکھتا تھا !

تمہیں مجھ  میں دانشور دکھتا ہے !"

دانشور کی طبیعت میں یہ کیسا بچپنا فیسبک نے رکھا ہے !

(ڈاکٹر عاکف خان)

یہ نظم پہلی مرتبہ فیسبک پر چھبیس اکتوبر دو ہزار بائیس کو چھپی۔ لنک درج ذیل ہے۔ 

https://www.facebook.com/534596120/posts/pfbid02t6jprP5JSHroR6xwSwxzcpjBUda5ngwQo191PoBVM1seUcsGMxosY4UK2da9Tyefl/?mibextid=q5o4bk

فیسبکی دانشور کیسے بنا جائے - حصہ دوئم

 

اس پر کچھ عرصہ پہلے ایک پوسٹ لکھی تھی۔ مگر طالبعلم اور وانا بی فیسبک دانشور یعنی معمولی دانشور یا دانشوڑ ہونے کے ناتے روزانہ کچھ نیا سیکھنے کو ملتا ہے۔ 

بڑے دانشور یا دانشور بننے کے چند مزید گر حاضر خدمت ہیں۔ 

دانشور کی ایک پہچان یہ ہوتی ہے کہ وہ کسی دانشوڑ کی پوسٹ کے نیچے کمنٹ نہیں کرتا۔ 

ایک اور پہچان یہ ہے کہ کسی دوسرے دانشور کی پوسٹ کے نیچے بھی کمنٹ نہیں کرتا بلکہ ایک نئی پوسٹ بنا کر اس کو جواب دیتا ہے۔ ٹویٹر پر یہ کام دوسروں کی پوسٹ کو کوٹ کر کے کمنٹ کرنے سے کیا جاتا ہے۔ 

اس کے علاوہ اپنی پوسٹ پر کسی کمنٹ کا جواب دینا بھی دانشور کے شایان شان نہیں۔ 

اور ہاں ریئکٹ تو بالکل بھی نہیں کرنا کسی کی پوسٹ پر۔ 

ان باتوں کے بہت سے فوائد ہیں۔ دانشوڑ آپ کے کمنٹ پر آپ سے اعتراض کر کے آپ کی بڑی شان گھٹا سکتا ہے۔ یہی کام اس کو جواب دینے سے بھی ہو سکتا ہے۔ 

ہاں وہ آپ کی اپنی پوسٹ کے نیچے جتنا مرضی آپ کو گالیاں دیتا رہے، اس سے آپ کی شان بڑھے گی، گھٹے گی نہیں۔ اس سے یہ ثابت ہو گا کہ آپ کو کتنی گالیاں پڑ رہی ہیں مگر آپ پھر بھی اپنے عزم پر ثابت قدم ہیں۔ یہی گالیاں اگر آپ کو دانشوڑ کی پوسٹ کے نیچے پڑیں تو فائدہ؟ الٹا اس دانشوڑ کا فائدہ ہو گا کہ اس کے اتنے جانثار فالوور ہیں کہ اس کا دفاع کر رہے ہیں۔ 

ریئکٹ نہ کرنے کا یہ فائدہ ہے کہ دانشوڑ آپ کے ریئکٹ لوگوں کو دکھا کر اپنی دانشوری کا لیول اونچا کر سکتا ہے۔ اوئے دیکھو اتنے بڑے بڑے دانشور بھی میرے خیال سے متفق ہوتے ہیں۔ 

ان باتوں کو ذہن میں رکھیں اگر آپ نے دانشور بننا ہے تو ورنہ آپ ساری عمر دانشوڑ ہی رہیں گے۔

This Week in Science - 28-02-22

This week in science.

Extragalactic FRB: https://bit.ly/3vn66ke

Brain waves in death: https://bit.ly/3BVWfmZ

Glass spheres on the Moon: https://bit.ly/3IuXNH1

Asteroid impact: https://bit.ly/36CsID2

Largest family tree: https://bit.ly/3C0PBvO

Grieving dogs: https://bit.ly/3srdqJZ

Via @ScienceAlert

فیسبکی دانشور کیسا بنا جائے؟ حصہ اول

 

بڑا فیسبک دانشور بننے کے چھ سنہری رول

رول نمبر ون: کسی دوسرے فیسبکی دانشوڑ کی پوسٹ پڑھ کر اس کے نیچے کمنٹ نہ کریں بلکہ اپنی نئی پوسٹ بنائیں چاہے آپ کو اس پوسٹ سے اتفاق ہے یا اختلاف۔ 

رول نمبر ٹو: کمنٹ کرنے والے لوگ فالوورز ہوتے ہیں یا چھوٹے، غیر اہم اور غیر مقبول دانشوڑ

رول نمبر تھری: اپنی پوسٹس پر کمنٹس کا جواب دینا بھی چھوٹے دانشوڑوں کا طور ہے۔ کمنٹس کو بسہولت اگنور کیا کریں۔ 

رول نمبر فور: کسی دوسرے دانشور کی پوسٹ کو کسی قسم کا ریئکٹ دینا بھی بڑے دانشوروں کے شایان شان نہیں ہے۔ ہاں، اگر وہ کوئی خاتون ہیں تو ریئکٹ کیا آپ ان کے کمنٹس سیکشن میں اپنے لیول کے دانشوروں کی باقائدہ طویل کمنٹی کانفرنس بھی منعقد کر سکتے ہیں۔ 

رول نمبر فائیو: گاوں کے چوھدریوں، ایم این ایز اور ملکوں وغیرہ کی طرح صرف غمی خوشی میں کمنٹس کیا کریں جیسے کسی کی وفات، گریجویشن یا شادی کی پوسٹ پر۔ لیکن یاد رہے پہلے دیکھ لیں کہ وہاں دوسرے بڑے دانشوروں کے کم از کم درجن کمنٹس آ چکے ہوئے ہوں۔ 

رول نمبر سکس:کسی دوسرے دانشور کی پوسٹ ہرگز شیئر نہ کریں۔ ورنہ اس کو مفت کی ٹی آر پی ملے گی اور آپ کے فالوورز بھی چھین کر لے جائے گا۔ کوئی پوسٹ اگر بہت ہی معلوماتی یا دانشوڑانہ ہو یا آپ کے نقطہ نظر کی تائید کر رہی ہو اور آپ کے اندر کا کمزور انسان دوست دانشوڑ بہت مجبور کرے تو دو طریقے ہیں۔ 

اول پوسٹ کاپی پیسٹ کر کے ان کا نام کونے میں چھوٹا سا لکھیں۔ ٹیگ ہرگز نہ کریں اور تعریف کرنے کی بالکل ضرورت نہیں۔ وہ چھوٹا دانشوڑ ویسے ہی اتنا شکرگزار ہو جائے گا، آپ کو گھبرانے کی ضرورت بالکل نہیں ہے۔ 

دوسرا اور آزمودہ اور عام طریقہ یہ ہے کہ وہی بات اپنے الفاظ میں لکھ ماریں جیسے وہ وحی آپ پر ہی نازل ہوئی اور بالکل ایسے برتاو کریں جیسے آپ نے دوسری پوسٹ دیکھی ہی نہ ہو کبھی زندگی میں۔ یہاں آپ کو کسی کی پوسٹ لائیک نہ کرنے کا فائدہ بھی سمجھ آئے گا۔

Limit (A Short Scifi Story)

Source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/playstationblogeurope/14064995855

By Dr. Akif Khan

Captain M and her crew of 5 aboard AZK-Delta-3031-85 were very excited when they embarked on this mission. After 3 years long cryosleep in their chambers, they finally woke up. It would take another 2 weeks to reach this new exoplanet where they hope to find life. So far, they had just entered this star system of Alpha-987587ET star. AZK-Delta-3031-085 was 85th among the 300 missions which were launched in space in year 3031 towards the potential life-inhabiting planets. The development of science and technology in the last millennium made great leaps in space travel and technology. Multiple new warp drives were invented and finally a warp drive with a potential to travel near speed of light was finally invented. It took a 100 years to refine the graviton-based communication system and models to create a perfect balance in time-lapse during travel and back home. Although, the time-lapse was imminent at near-light-speed-travels causing time to warp but graviton-based communication could at least overcome the time delay due to distances in space. The design of spacecrafts were revolutionized as well. The exoskeleton type of catalytic and thermoregulatory suits called X-suits made of biomaterials were able to adapt and harness breathable gases from any kind of atmosphere, regulate body temperature, adapt to different gravities and would interact with central nervous system at neural levels.

The crew headed towards the medical bay and their muscles were reformed using the technology on-board. Meanwhile, they were watching the star-system in wonder. Most of the planets were visible through the windows and the view was awe-inspiring. The other gas giants and planets with moons and rings around them reminded them of home.

"What are we hoping to find captain? The asteroid belt and the thick atmosphere didn't let us see much inside." Being a true scientist, S was more curious among all of them about the possibilities than she was scared.

"At least, some low level intelligent life and plants. As you know we are only concerned with the presence of atmosphere and water, this isn't a big issue. Besides, we didn't find any sign of advanced technology." Captain didn't entertain the wonder regarding aesthetics in S's question. She was always a cold and straightforward scientist, curious but not as excited as the rest of the crew. Her whole life was dedicated to science and was spent growing and learning sciences from a very little age in the international academy of sciences. S, on the other hand was not only inspired by science but was enamored by the beauty and symmetry in the nature, traits that Captain always conveniently ignored and considered irrelevant to science. Lt. D smiled at captain's reply enjoying this altercation while setting up the ultra high speed cameras recording the orbits of planets and rebuilding a 3D radio hologram. Systems engineer V and pilots J and N were busy setting up the final course around the planet. The plan was to make quick 10 orbits around the planet at different angles to map the geology of the planet from the outer atmosphere with occasional dives inside the atmosphere. Although, the atmosphere was thick, at the warp speeds, due to the design of the small shuttle and counter-thermal shields they were not much worried about any damage they would've worried about a millennium ago. It will only take them around 30 minutes to make 10 orbits with 50 dives and 5 second pauses over water bodies. Afterwards, they have to stop over water on a coastal area to take material samples from water and land. The whole mission is supposed to take 2 hours and then they would be on their way back to home. Captain was thinking of boring two weeks ahead scanning the star system.

Finally, the day arrived when they had to make orbits. The exoplanet was a nice blue globe with rich atmosphere. It reminded them of home again. Interestingly, it also had one moon. Pilot J. launched the two drones which would accompany the main shuttle in a triangular manner while completing the orbits. The orbits started. Gravity absorbers around main chamber made the aircraft least affected by the high speeds during the orbiting and they didn't feel a bit of added Gs. The gravity of the planet was less than home. The vegetation was evolved in a little different way because of the tilt of the planet towards the star while the chemical composition and the atmospheric variation of the planet was pretty much the same carbon-based. Unfortunately, they couldn't make stopovers over land for longer time periods due to the safety and the aims and objectives of the mission. S was much antagonized by this decision. However, she did manage to convince the decision board to allow her to collect samples from water instead of robots and this was the part of the mission she was most excited about.

"The bureaucracy is too stupid to not allow us stopping over land during orbiting to be honest." S stopped saying anything further when she saw Captain's eyes.

"S, remember, everything said and done on this shuttle is being recorded and will be transcribed and sent to bureaucracy and I and captain are also parts of that bureaucracy." Lt. D smiled again and reminded S of the procedures.

"Well, fuck fascism and fuck authoritarianism. I wonder that after excelling so much in science and technology, we still have to bother about speaking our minds, that too millions of miles away from those dumb meatbags with useless stars on their chests." This time S didn't bother about the stare of the captain. She was always a rebel.

"Remember, this science and technology became possible due to those useless meatbags." Lt. D was a little agitated this time.

"No, it didn't. It became possible because of the equality, progress and peace. Sadly, power and greed took all the credit." S seemed ferocious.

"Well, no wonder they sent you out here." Dee laughed.

This was the last orbit and computer will calculate the probability of landing on the basis of versatility of life within few minutes after the orbital run is completed. The geology of the whole planet was mapped and the data was also sent back to the headquarters. It would take 7 days for data to reach HQ.

"Captain, the run is complete. Computer has determined this location for sample collection. It is in the middle of the planet where the land ends and it is a very long coastline." J informer captain.

"Alright, set course. Everyone, get ready. S, are you ready for sampling if you are done with politics?" Captain was cold but sometimes could be quite bitter as well.

"I was wearing my X-suit while doing my politics Ma'am. Rights and responsibilities work parallel." Chuckled S.

"The sea looks calm. There are small tides but I think we can handle them." Lt. D informed captain.

"Set the mission timeline. I don't want to spend an extra second on this stupid planet." Captain was not interested in anything beyond mission.

The shuttle landed around 500 meters from the shore. S took a step outside. Meanwhile, N was logging the incident on voice.

While S jumped into the water, she felt something moving past her. She turned to look but couldn't see anything. Se moved a little deeper and opened the sample container to collect water when she felt a deep pain in her leg. Something bit her. She screamed in the com channel, "Help, there is something in the water. It bit me and it is not leaving my leg. My suit is ruptured." She felt another bite and when she looked she saw two swimming animals 2 times longer than her with sharp teeth and no limbs. White and blue in colour, they had flaps and tails with which they were swimming, much like sea fauna back home but very terrifying especially while their mouths were dripping with her blood.

She tried to get away from them and moved towards the shuttle and finally she succeeded. Lt. D was standing in the door holding the laser gun. He shot at one animal. It was painful but she swam towards the ship. 10 meters distance felt like 10 light years to her. The noise of splashing increased behind her. She didn't dare look behind. D was constantly giving her cover. Finally, she reached the stairs and started climbing. D gave her his hand and she held it. That is when she saw one of the animal jumping out of the water and biting D's head clean off his body. She shouted in horror and D's body fell on her taking her down into the water. She saw around 20 of animals circling her.

In the cockpit, Captain M was trying to assess the situation. This all happened within 5 minutes and although they were trained to tackle such situations, she became numb for a minute. She saw D's head being chopped off. She moved back and ordered J and V to ready the shuttle to take off and told N to accomapny her in order to save S. They held their guns and stood at the door looking for S. They were all wearing X-suits now as there was no time for compression and decompression of the shuttle. The atmosphere had enough pressure and concentration of gases and the rest was covered by the suits.

S saw the animals circling her. D's body started going up and down in the water. The dripping blood from his head attracted the animals and they all jumped on the body. They tore it apart in seconds. S saw this scene in horror. Eventually, she gathered her senses and moved towards the shuttle. Her movement attracted the attention of few of the animals and they started chasing her. Her legs were numb with pain and she could barely swim. She saw Captain and N standing in the door. She swam towards them. However, just 2 meters away, she felt another big bite on her leg and this time her leg was chopped off. She screamed with pain once again. The animal dragged her towards bottom but upon severing of her leg she tried to move upwards. This is when she hit the base of the shuttle while attempting to come out of the water and everything turned dark.

Captain saw S being dragged under the shuttle. She was not sure what to do. She turned inside and asked J to switch on the sonar to ascertain the position of S and animals. Suddenly, they heard the bangs on the base of the shuttle. Sonar and camera were disconnected. Perhaps animals had bitten them off. After stopping on water, the base of the shuttle spread to form legs which provided buoyancy to the shuttle and exposed the few inner parts of the shuttle. "Fucking design flaw for cost effectiveness by fucking bureaucracy. What would've come out of water, right?" Looked like S was speaking through captain.

Underneath, the animals were busy feasting on the body of S. Their numbers were increasing slowly. A couple of them were busy munching off the small enzyme-based biomaterial window on the bottom of the ship. It definitely looked tasty to them. However, it was the life-support system which was supposed to absorb gases from atmosphere and convert them into useful life-system raw material. It was also connected to the main oxygen tanks. In few minutes, they had almost chopped off the entire window and oxygen started bubbling out. One of the animal hit the window with its snout and it sparked causing an explosion in one of the tanks. The shuttle broke in half. V who was on lower deck was also blown into pieces due to explosion.

Captain had to do something when the explosion hit the deck. The shuttle was on fire and she had already lost 50% of her crew. The posterior half of the shuttle was hardly attached to the anterior half and the shuttle started sinking while at fire at the same time. She had no time. She told J and N to hold guns and at least drive these aliens away from the ship to let them plan something else. Little did she know that there were dozens of animals now circling the shuttle.

The water started entering the shuttle and electronic systems started failing one by one. She could see a couple of animals moving on the ship floor which was now completely drowned into the sea. All of them stood on the upper deck and started firing towards the animals they could see. This drove the animals crazy. They were smart. They dashed the bullets and jumped towards the deck. One of them jumped from water and the captain who never felt enamored by the beauty of nature became struck with its horror on seeing the face of death. N fired towards the animal and the animal switched the direction mid-air capturing N and taking him back into the water. Only J and Captain were left. She saw more water entering the shuttle and more animals with that. She knew it was the end.

She turned towards mic and did the one thing she had to do. Recorded the message and warned the HQ. "Mayday! Mayday! This is Captain M of AZK-Delta-301

31-085. We successfully landed on the Alpha-987587ET-03 planet of Alpha-987587ET star system. The planet has good vegetation but not as rich as ours and it is filled with beastly creatures. My whole crew has been attacked by these seemingly smart but beastly animals. Our shuttle has been destroyed and we are surrounded by dozens of these animals. There is no need to come to this planet. I repeat, there is no need to come to this horrible planet. Over and out!." Captain and N held their guns and started shooting at the animals. The fire in the posterior section eventually reached the rest of the oxygen tanks. There was a huge explosion and whole ship turned into pieces and ashes. On the land, there were two eyes watching the explosion.

Dawn News, Karachi, 10th of July, 1942, reported this local news story. "A ship exploded on the Karachi coastline. A medium sized ship was seen blasted 500 meters away from Karachi Clifton beach. The local fisherman saw the ship exploded with two blasts within 15 minutes. Meanwhile they heard whooshing sounds after the first explosion, probably due to the fireworks stored in the basement, which led to the second explosion. Sharks were seen circulating the wreckage. The beach has been shut down for a month now due to the repeated shark attacks. The rescue teams tried to find the survivors but they couldn't find anyone. The wreckage sank to the ocean floor and two burnt and disfigured dead bodies were found on the scene which were buried in Qayyumabad Graveyard as unidentified persons. An interesting observation was made by a local fisherman who told our correspondent that the recovered bodies looked like fully formed adults but they were only 2.5 feet tall and they were wrapped around with roots of some kind that they couldn't separate from the bodies and buried them as such. Local government official dismissed the claims calling them fairy tales of fishermen." 

Tabadla-e-Khayal | An Urdu Podcast

Tabadla-e-Khayal | Batein Kahi Unkahi is an Urdu podcast where Anila Ansari and Akif Khan will discuss social issues concerning Pakistanis specifically and South Asians generally. The podcasts will be available on Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts and YouTube. Guest Speakers are often invited on the podcast for their valued opinions. This is a purely volunteer social cause with no commercial value or stakes.

Official Website: www.tabadlakhayal.com

Team:

Presenters: Anila Ansari and Akif Khan

Graphics: Qazi Fida

Technical Support: Atif Zeb

Videographer: Shamshad Afridi

Anila Ansari is a communication expert with years of experience in journalism, radio activism and crisis intervention for gender related issues in United Kingdom and Pakistan. She is also a health improvement practitioner, a certified media and community trainer and a campaigner for gender rights. Her work has been covered widely by national and international media.

Akif Khan is a PhD in Natural Sciences, currently a Postdoc Fellow in a university abroad. He has served as a Researcher and Faculty in industry and academia for more than a decade. He is also a published writer, a blogger and a social activist. Besides Natural Sciences, he has a keen interest in social sciences including Anthropology, International Relations, Philosophy, History and Gender Studies. He is a member of many scientific organisations home and abroad, reviewer of scientific journals as well and has experience of editing an online magazine "The Rationalist." His major activism revolves around raising awareness about science and reason, democracy and human rights. He can be followed at @akifzeb on Twitter.

The rest of the team comprises of friends who are professional graphic designers, videographers or technical experts ans they have kindly offered us their valued professional services pro bono and we are extremely grateful to them for their sympathy towards a social cause. 

How to listen to the podcast?

Podcast is available at Apple and Google Podcasts.

Podcast can also be directly followed at http://tabadlakhayal.podbean.com/ and can be listened directly on the website or podbean's android and playstore app, which can be downloaded from www.podbean.com.

All episodes will be launched on Facebook Page and YouTube Channel as well. 

Facebook Page: fb.me/TKPodcastUrdu

YouTube Channel: https://youtu.be/ToBcEjYBs_4

News and Events:

News and events can be followed at our Facebook page, Instagram and Twitter.

Facebook: fb.me/TKPodcastUrdu

Instagram: @tabadlakhayal

Twitter: @TabadlaK

A Critical Analysis of Imran Khan's Speech in UNGA

Until when, will we, as a nation, try to keep ourselves drunk on past glories, blame games, victimhood and empty rhetoric? Being a strong critic of Khan, his party and followers, several friends tried to direct my attention towards yesterday's speech. I heard it live but didn't comment because I was shocked and surprised at the shallowness of what was said and honestly didn't know what to make of it. The celebrations of PTI supporters were expected, even those who were quite dormant recently due to bad performance of PTI in its one year of government in center and six years of government in KP province. Perhaps, they are less to blame as they saw a hope in Khan or they were made to believe so; the Messiah complex that we as a society suffer from. So they need something to satiate their longing for that hope (or shortcut) and surely their leader knows that.

Climate change is a hot topic and it was good to see him talking about that. However,  we have to do more than planting trees. Dams and bad urban planning also ruin the climate and the ecosystems. Climate change activists such as Baba Jan has been kept under arrest in Gilgit for a long time now because he raised the concerns on government's planning regarding Attabad Lake. Lack of water management is drying up the underground aquifers in Pakistan and government is doing nothing about that. Dams are a real threat to environment, yet we see government run campaigns for new dams. Our cities have no waste management systems, have bad sewage systems and almost no waste-water treatment plants. Industries dump poison in river . In my 2008 research paper, I found 50 times more heavy metals than permissible limits in the waste water of 3 bigger industrial estates of North (Peshawar, Hattar and Gujranwala.) It's been 11 years and the amounts of these poisonous metals have increased instead of being controlled.

Money laundering is definitely a big problem but instead of telling world not to accept free investment, shouldn't we make our own laws to control that? Two of PM's close aides have been disqualified because of corruption. Big companies and billionaires are bailed out by government via presidential and SC orders. Government has failed to find ways to make the money-draining institutions culpable and to bring them under audit. Governmental schemes are ridden with stories of corruption. Shouldn't  we start this from our own home instead of lecturing world and instead of using corruption as a mere populist slogan?

Some of the old critics of Khan also looked impressed of the speech. The only positive thing, one could honestly see in that speech was raising the issue of Kashmir. But there's this thing. It is a story of oppression by an oppressor, not a story of Islamophobia as he mentioned. Had it been put this way by him, it would have been better. Besides, we made this country on the basis of two nation theory. Indians did not. So why do you wonder if Muslims of Kashmir aren't opressed because of this identity? Who has started this identity debate? Besides, what RSS is doing in India is not much different than what we do here to our religious minorities including Ahmadis, Hindus, Shia, Hazara and Christians. Need I remind someone the atrocities these people face on the daily basis in Pakistan? And is there not the same reason (Muslim and non-Muslim idenity) behind this systemic opression? It's just that the face of the opressor is different here. It's us over here and it's them over there. 

World is not run on emotions. It is run on solid realities of the present such as economy, wealth and power. He is right that world takes India more seriously and why shouldn't it do that? If we had a better economic standing and human rights record, only then could we lecture the world on these things and only then would world take us seriously. 

Yes, he pissed India off. But how is that a chest-thumping success? How is that going to change anything? Will world take us seriously now? I call it empty rhetoric because our foreign policy has failed. We couldn't garner the support of merely 16 countries for filing a resolution on Kashmir in United Nations Human Rights Commission. For the resolution to be adopted, it needed further 8 votes. Last time I checked there were 50+ Muslim countries in the world. Your foreign policy and claim of being the leader of Muslim world has failed. Shouting in front of Uniter Nations' General Assembly for three times more than the allotted time isn't going to make much difference. Actions speak louder than words! 

Some people are comparing his speech with Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto's "courageous" speech in UN on 15th of December, 1971. We all know what happened the next day, don't we? The difference between courage and stupidity is defined by the results that are achieved. The head of states are not activists or motivational speakers that they lecture others to take action. They are not Greta Thunberg, who can move the world by her emotional outburst, even when she was factual and precise despite all those emotions. It doesn't work this way. Head of states are guided by action and substance. 

I don't want to start a debate on Islamophobia. But let me ask Mr. PM, did he include Ahmadis and Shia in 1.3 billion Muslims? Do we ourselves not hurt each others religious sentiments ourselves? Not one single sect considers other sects true Muslims. Takfir and sectarian violence within our societies is a normal thing. He said terrorism has no religion. But have you considered this fact that terrorists extract all their ideological motivations from religion? Do our religious scholars not endorse their Jihad, let alone condemn it? Does an exploding Muslim due to religious reasons not scare someone? What have we done to reduce the sentiment of so-called Islamophobia in west? We leave our countries ridden with economic instability and sectarian and state violence and then try to establish the same in west. We tell them to respect our religious sentiments. And when they come to our countries, we again tell them to cover themselves and to be respectful. And they do. What else do you want? Beggars can't be choosers. Are the people of Yemen and Syria not Muslims? Who is killing them? Is the war in the Middle East not a result of sectarian clash and power politics of two Muslim countries? Who gave the refuge to Yemeni and Syrian refuges when war broke out? How Muslim countries close their borders to Muslim refuges, whether Syrian, Yemenis or Palestianians, in these cases, is not some secret. Just one day before this speech in UNGA, Pakistan voted against extending the on-going investigation on war crimes in Yemen, alongside Saudi Arabia and India. And yet, we have the audacity to call upon the hypocrisy of "west" against Muslims. Furthermore, human rights violations, racism and anti-Muslim bigotry (a right word for Islamophobia) are real issues and more people in west speak about it considering it their own problem than us. We do not have a power position or moral standing to lecture them on this, also considering what we are doing to our own minorities. 

We should come out of the delusions that we have surrounded ourselves with and better work on ourselves. Talking about Kashmir and the plight of Kashmiris is great but what have we done to reduce their plight in real? Talking about Human Rights is easy when you try to score some political points or to support your empty rhetoric but the defenders of human rights in your own country have to run for their lives. They are called traitors, persecuted, lynched by mobs, killed by their closed ones, threatened and chased by security apparatus, abducted and made to flee from the country. The issue of human rights is called a foreign and western agenda here and is frowed upon. Selective outrage won't help. World is not stupid. They can see through your selective humanity. 

This speech can give some simpletons goosebumbps and pamper their feelings of grandeur but not to anyone with critical insight of current politics, history and international relations. And even if one ignores all above as a mere rant of some desi liberal, the end justifies the mean. Let's wait for the results of the speech. Let's see if the world really moves after this. I am sure, deep down, you are also wondering how any word of this speech will make any practical difference. The real courage comes from accepting the truth. 

Moon sighting: Discussing scientific perspective with astronomer and scientist Salman Hameed of Hampshire College, Massachusetts

Akif Khan and Salman Hameed discuss the topic of moon sighting, the method through which the start of months of the Islamic calendar are identified.  Khan jokes that it could also be called “moon fighting”, as announcements about the sighting of the moon (or not) can make the beginning of holidays rather chaotic.

They start by discussing how Hameed became interested in astronomy, watching Carl Sagan on Cosmos, realizing that professional astronomy was a possibility.

Hameed describes the Moon’s phases from an astronomer’s perspective.  He notes how the well-documented orbit of the Moon around the Earth means that the calculations for the phases are very precise and can readily be known far into the future.  He clarifies how the structure of the religious sighting of the Moon differs:  because it needs to be sighted with the human eye, and because of variations in atmospheric conditions (cloud, haze, etc), it is unclear how far past the astronomical new moon an observer must be before the new crescent is visible.  Hameed suggests that at approximately 14 hours past the astronomical new moon, the crescent becomes possible to be viewed with the naked eye on Earth under optimal viewing conditions.  For less optimal conditions, perhaps 18 or 20 hours past the astronomical new moon.

The pair discuss the problems experienced in Pakistan about sighting the Moon, including attempting to sight the new crescent from less than optimal locations.  They suggest that standardizing the calendar based on some mark would eliminate all the problems, and allow people to plan ahead.  Hameed mentions various ways this standardization could occur, from using the astronomical new moon to choosing a standard offset from the astronomical new moon, to centering the viewing based on what is seen (based on astronomical measurement) in Mecca.

Hameed notes that it is likely only a matter of time before this standardization will be forced to occur.  He suggests that people will be living on the Moon itself or on Mars within the next century or two, and will thus be unable to sight the Moon’s crescent with the naked eye from those locations.  At that point, some standard will have to be used.

The video is part of a media documentary series by the Rationalist Society of Pakistan.  This video was directed by Akif Khan, and the media coordinator was Anila Athar.

The Midnight Crisis - Excerpt 2

Chapter XVII

Cowardice

 

I have a big hole in my heart. I can't fill it with anything. I have tried. Trust me Valeria. I really did.

You will always be a stupid Raphael. Always!

I don't know. But I missed you.

 

You didn't miss me. You are just a creepy jealous asshole.

I'm not. If I am, why would I be so nice to your boyfriend.

I don't know. Maybe you are a coward. Maybe you don't want to confront him because at the social level, he is morally superior than you.

Why'd I care about social moralities.

You don't. But you are scared of them. You hate them I know. But you still have to cope with them.

 

 What else can I do?

Haha! Really? You know the answer!

You want me to become Romeo?

He was a human too. Why can't you be?

Will you become Juliet too?

Romeo never cared what Juliet would do. He never knew. He did what he had to do.

 

Will you be happy watching me destroyed?

See! That's your problem. You know you will be destroyed. That's why you don't dare. That's why you are a coward.

I have to consider so many things Valeria. I am bound.

Then don't complain. Then you are a common man. All men are bound. To stand aside, you must do what common men don't do.

I have to fight on so many fronts. I can't be special on all fronts.

Then don't complain. Then this front, love, isn't your forte.

 

 

She always made me speechless. Maybe she is right. I shouldn't complain.

​

Luck

It's a common saying that luck did or didn't favour me. You hear everyone blaming their luck all the time. But this concept of a supernatural force is nothing but a farce. There is no thing called luck. But yeah, there are chances and probabilities. 

It's hard to understand that this can be the case. And we can never be ready to lose our faith in such a useful concept. You win a lottery, you think you are lucky. You don't work hard, still get the best results, you think you are lucky. Sometimes it's the opposite, you do your best but you don't get the desired results. You think you are unlucky. And sometimes it happens to you quite often. So you are lucky or you are unlucky based on the number of lucky happenings. 

How does it actually work? 

We all set our future on the basis of choices we make. Every event in the future is based on the choices we make in the present. We chose to take bus number 10 and not 201. We meet a person and eventually end up having a relationship with that person. We think that it was luck that made us sit in bus number 10 and not 201. But if we get robbed in bus number 10, we think it's just our bad luck that we were in that bus. Good feeling to blame something else for an "accident." Actually, both were accidents. One makes you happy so you consider it a result of good luck and the other one as a bad luck. Imagine, the same beloved you find on that bus eventually proves to be the worst partner ever, or if the robbers were not inside and had not stopped the bus, the bus would've crashed into a trailer whose brakes are failed. You never know! And you never know what is on bus number 201. 

Some people would argue that sometimes they do their best and still don't get the desired results. While others don't do enough but get the best. Well, it's just the way how "we" see things. We never know who has done more hard work than us. We never know who is more intelligent than us. We never know who has made better choices than us. Again, we never know what's on bus number 201, unless we embark it. 

Imagine there are two buildings opposite to each other, having four doors in all directions. Only south and north being in front of each other. If a persons from each building exits a door at the same time. The probability of meeting each other would be maximum if they would exit opposite North and South doors and would be minimum if they leave from the alternative North and South doors. So it depends on the choice they make. These choices may or may not be conscious. 

Usually we find it easy to put all the blame on luck and remain delusional about our own drawbacks. It is hard to accept our own lacking. But it is the only practical way to improve our chances. Some things we can chose, others we can't. Those we can, should be chosen with a sound understanding for better results. A man born in impoverished family can't have a personal jet but can improve his available chances to end up being not poor. Once in a while, you will find someone, born this way, ending up having a personal jet too. But that's rare. Probability works here the same way it works in our scientific experiments. Do you really want to bet on such a low probability? Would you bet your next pay-check on two rolling dice to have six appeared on both of them together in the first attempt? Would you bet on that chance? 

To improve our luck, we can only have better choices and make our understanding of better choices more better. This is the only realistic and practical way and I think it is a better way than to leave anything to chance. Chance may or may not be in our favour. You can never know. You should improve what you already know.

Why Pakistan needs secularism

(This piece was orginally published in The Nation and can be read here.)

In Pakistan, liberals are often accused of working on the Western agendas and being covert agents of “enemies” of Pakistan. They are also thought to be the ones who malign Pakistan’s image by cherry-picking few mishaps in the country. Let us explore the basis of these accusations and why these liberal “fascists” cry for secularism and liberalism and are opposed to Islamic system (aka Khilafat) in the country.

First of all there is this national narcissistic attitude and national state of denial. The incoherent syllabus, media and jingoist protectors of the “ideological boundaries” reinforce this state of narcissism and delusion. We need to realize that there are issues here and we have to address them. The first stage is - to identify these problems, the second is speaking up, third creating awareness and the last stage is where we will be able to move towards finding solutions.

Why is Waar a Poor Propaganda Flick

Being a movie buff, I could not ignore the hype of a Pakistani movie rated 9/10 on imdb.com. So, I bought this DVD of Waar as soon as I saw the poster of its availability on a local shop. Cutting the chase, there was I watching it while a similar Islamabad fiasco of Imran Khan was being unfolded on 13th August; Superb choice on Independence Day?

To my disappointment, the opening scene of the movie was so substandard that a movie rated 3 on imdb would be better off. Two men in an interrogation room were having the sacks removed from their heads. And lo and behold it seemed like the guy just exited a saloon after a perfect haircut, freshly trimmed beard and even whitening powder applied on his face. The much-talked about ‘talented’ young director could do better than that. Anyways, at last I was watching the most awaited movie, which is, in fact, an epic amalgamation of official Pakistan studies curriculum and popular conspiracy theories – surely what more could be expected from an ISPR production.

Pakistan: An interactive guide for Hollywood and Bollywood Movie Makers

IT is often very funny to see the international media, especially TV and Film Industry, portaying Pakistan as some country where women are covered in black overalls or shuttlecock burqas, people having beards and no moustaches with a checkered cloth over their shoulders, riding donkeys, wiping their behinds with stones, narrow streets, dusty roads, people speaking Arabic, goats on highways, people travelling in Jeeps and 70s Trucks.

In Pakistan, people think that it is a western conspiracy against them. To me it is sheer ignorance and laziness on the behalf of TV and film industry. One could see the example of this, recently, when fourth season of a TV Series, Homeland started airing. Where Islamabad is shown as some dusty city with narrow streets, people speaking wrong Urdu, everyone bearded, Americans walking in Miran Shah without being noticed, Taliban commanders having sex with their wives in the presence of a guest in the exact room. Similarly, in the movie Zero Dark Thirty, common people were shown speaking Arabic in Pakistan (Not 1% of the population speaks Arabic in Pakistan.) I do not take any pride in Pakistan being a modernised country. It is not a symbol of development to me. However, if you consider that you can depict Pakistan with some orientalist mindset as a completely backward, tribal, under-developed country of retards, you would be very wrong there bro! It is called cultural ignorance. And this mindset is not only targeting (purposefully or unconsciously)  Pakistan, but also Iran and Middle East.

Another Open Letter to Imran Khan

Imran Khan claims that UK government allows similar protests like his "dharnas." A friend from Australia wrote a letter to UK Prime Minister to ask whether they allow such protests or not. This is the reply he received from Home Department alongwith his own open letter to Imran Khan.

Warning: If you are a die-hard PTI fan and like all other PTI fans you cannot face criticism and start showing following symptoms, you are warned again. Do not proceed! Any harm or injury caused to yourself or people around you will be solely your own responsibility.

Verbal Diarrhea (Very Important), Rectal Burns, Acute Delusion Disorder (ADD), Palpitation, Shortness of breath, Swelling, Redness, Chest Pain, Itching (especially the one to carry a weapon), Bumps

Chairman PTI,
Mr Imran Khan,


Dear Mr. Khan,

I hope you are doing well and your health is good.

Upon your repeated blatant and nonsensical claims about the disruptive and destructive dharnas, and the violence that they have resulted as being constitutional and that "Even in Britain such demonstrations are people's constitutional rights", I finally decided to clear the matter once and for all- for the rest of the nation. As for you, I am sure you already know you are doing wrong when you are inciting people to violence. A decent man with any sense of respect and integrity and above all, some common sense would not incite people to violence, vandalism and breaking law as you have been doing for last couple of months. But then , if you were that sensible, why would you be doing all that in the first place?

I already knew that your argument "Even in Britain such demonstrations are people's constitutional rights", was nonsensical as would anyone with any degree of intelligence, but I did what I did, just to complete the loop and provide everyone with an undeniable proof,that inciting people to such rioting,vandalism, hooliganism, had you done this in United Kingdom, and breaking law and thug behavior like bringing cranes to crash gates, attacking and vandalizing TV station, or unlawfully entering parliament grounds ,could have likely/possibly resulted in your arrest, prosecution and if found guilty, imprisonment for upto ten years.

In order to clarify the matter, I wrote to the Prime Minister of United Kingdom about how such "Demonstrations" are conducted in Britain and what are the rules and laws that govern such demonstrations.
In response, the Home Office replied on his behalf and here is the full letter. Since you suffer from lack of intelligence and attention to detail, I have highlighted the parts which you are likely to miss.

I am very well aware and cognizant that you and your zealots will simply continue to be in denial, but nevertheless,for rest of the nation, this letter seals your rants to be nothing but a blatant lie.

While I am here, I would like to clear one more matter. Some people are claiming that you are a cocaine addict. I think it would be good for you to deny that categorically. Would you be happy to be randomly tested for drugs?

PS: If Amir Dogar is your "Naya Pakistan", then I am way better off with my "Old Pakistan".
Your Sincerely

Dr Muhammad Umer Shehzad
Australia (*)

* Blogger's Note: This will be another reality shock for PTI fans but please note that not all expat Pakistanis necessarily belong to PTI.